SPENDING THIS UNSEEN DAY

Today is 1st June 2020, the day nurseries have opened back up. Our daughter, who is 15 months old, has had some extremely precious time at home with her parents, but today is her chance to rejoin a group of small people again and learn some mannerisms and words which don’t come from us.

The day ahead

Having kissed my husband goodbye at 5’o’clock this morning, I readied myself for my first day alone in the house to get on with a very long list of things to achieve. In the past, whenever I found myself with a couple of weeks, or longer if I took a break between jobs, I’d put huge pressure on myself, wear myself out, berate myself for not getting enough done or start procrastination tasks which never got finished. This time, I’ve decided to take each day as it comes.

My priority? To take care of myself and allow the fact that I’ve done that, make me more productive. Normally, I’d fail to eat enough, fail to prepare food, fail to take food with me on an outing, fail to rest when my body needed it or generally just overdo it by fitting far too much in too early in the day. Today has been an interesting start.

It is 12.30pm, nearly lunchtime and I feel pleased with the morning and excited for the afternoon. I have done what needs to be done, but looked at it with a perspective of self-care.

5am - I wake up to hear our daughter crying and my husband coming out of the bathroom to leave for work. I bring her into our bed to sleep the rest of the morning with me. We sleep through until 8am. Self-care level 1 complete - enough sleep - done!

Now to fit in health, happiness and kindness

8am - Thirst and hunger start the day. Within a couple of minutes of waking, we are downstairs, my daughter on my hip drinking from her bottle and then I’m onto cooking poached eggs and toast with a pinch of homegrown basil for our breakfast. Strapped into her chair, [thank goodness for reins!] I’m able to feed her, clean up around her and get myself presentable enough to leave the house. I find the nursery bag, unearth the suncream, spare sunhat, washable nappies and spare clothes before flinging it all together into the pram. A quick nappy change, donning of the cutest ‘back to school’ dress I could find, brush of the teeth amid a few “I want to be independent” tears, same with the hairbrush and into the bathroom. I pulled up a stool for her at the sink and for the first time, she enjoyed having her hands washed. Granted she couldn’t reach the tap, so I splashed water over them and foamed up the soap for her, but it was a step in the right direction.

Now this is the start of real multi-tasking

9am - Off to nursery. Strapped into the pram, she is ready for her big adventure and reintroduction to her nursery pals. No walks in the park to spy the doggies today! Now this is the start of the real multi-tasking. Until now, apart from dashing off a couple of times leaving her in her highchair, (don’t worry I didn’t leave food for her to choke on), I’ve managed to stay present with her and make sure she had my attention and love. Now, she’s in her pushchair - newly put together last night after spending weeks riding around in her car seat like a chariot. She is facing forward and looking out into the big exciting world, happy to only see my face every so often.

So I find my bluetooth earphones and start the day with the ability to touch base and learn, whilst getting the necessary stuff done.

The nursery run is about a 20 minute walk in each direction. In 3 hours, I accomplish these 10 things towards my health, happiness and kindness aims.

  1. Take a walk to drop my daughter at nursery = health

  2. Phone my colleague who I speak to every ‘work’ day to maintain a semblance of normality for us both = mental health + kindness

  3. Find a table base, being discarded by a house on my commute and get her number so I can check with my husband if I’m allowed to rescue it before it ends up in the tip = happiness

  4. Listen to 2 hours of ‘Work Like A Woman’ by Mary Portas on Audible during commute, shopping and cleaning = self-growth = happiness

  5. Make and drink a fruit, veg, seed and hemp protein smoothie = health

  6. Visit a small supermarket without queues for basic food supplies for me and my Grumpa = health + kindness

  7. Ring an old colleague I hadn’t spoken to in a while to see how she was coping = kindness

  8. Unload the dishwasher, wash up, clean down the kitchen side, put on the washing, clean the bath and nappy tub, sweep the downstairs floors and change the cat water so my husband doesn’t end up doing it = kindness

  9. Speak to my next door neighbour and a passing neighbour from the front garden = happiness & mental health

  10. Prepare and eat my lunch before I’m too hungry = health

Why bother recording today’s achievements?

The point of me writing this down and sharing it is to highlight the importance of the mindset I have given the day. If I had started the day as I usually would, I may have still got as much done. Although I doubt it. I would possibly have skipped the 2 hours of self-growth from listening to a book, and I would definitely have felt a lot more drained by it. Instead, I took each bit of time for what it was and how it was benefiting my goals of health, happiness and kindness.

Jane TarrantComment