MY FAILURE CV - JANE TARRANT

My Career Failures And What I Learned

Rather than looking at a CV, (aka resume), as a way to sell yourself or list your achievements, have you thought to view it from a different perspective in order to see what you have learned from your failures?

I’m going to share with you MY FAILURE CV. Instead of pointing out what I did during each role or how much value I added, I’m going to point out my key career failures, and what Iearned from them.

Some may view this as brave or even stupid, but I feel that it is vital to highlight the importance of self-awareness when progressing in your career. If you don’t learn from your failures, you will end up repeating them in job after job. That doesn’t benefit your employer or yourself.

Jane Tarrant’s Failure CV

This CV is written in chronological order starting in 2005 and ending in 2017. I have chosen to leave out my current career position for now.

Waiting Staff (Waitress)

Various Restaurants & Pubs

[Duration 3 years]

Failure 1:

I failed to even consider that self-doubt should hold me back. (Now this failure was a nice failure to have had.)

What I learned from my failure:

I had aspired to be a waitress in my teens from a very young age. I achieved that goal at 17 when I was hired as a waitress for a local pub, beating 15 other bar legal candidates, despite their key aim to have someone who could cover the bar. When I asked why I got the job, my boss at the time, James said, “I’ve never met anyone so excited about getting a job”. I happily worked hard for James across 3 pubs during my teens and will be forever grateful that he took a ‘punt’ on me.

I learned that I had nothing to lose by trying and this gave me the confidence to literally walk in unannounced (CV in hand and dressed for an interview) on no less than 6 of my jobs since. I didn’t have a 100% success rate on the number I went into, but I had a 100% success rate of getting a job and impressing them from the offset.

Spa Guest Relations Officer (University Placement)

5 Star Hotel Resort (Whistler)

[Duration 3 months]

Failure 2:

I quit my degree and therefore this placement year too before I had to pay more fees.

What I learned from my failure:

It was absolutely the right thing to do. I had doubts about university before going, but attended the first year because of family pressure. I don’t regret going for 1 year as I learned about what university is like even if only to better prepare my child. Something which neither of my parents had experienced. I also felt I could achieve more in life without a degree than with one, which I still stand by.

Failure 3:

I was so homesick and depressed that I spent more money than I was earning.

What I learned from my failure:

I had luckily been wise enough to spend the money on clothes which I would wear in the workplace so I was nicely set up for a career in the UK. I learned that if a job causes you to be cashflow negative, it is not worth working in that job unless you can afford to do so and it is of greater benefit than income to you in another way.

Sales Executive (Internship)

London Based Events Company

[Duration 1 month]

Failure 4:

I worked so many hours that I fainted on the tube then came down with a chest infection and had to be collected by my parents to be looked after.

What I learned from my failure:

I had secured an unpaid internship immediately after the recession, which I seeked out after being turned down for a job because another candidate had 1 week’s cold calling experience. I was working full time in an office whilst working 4 nights per week at a bar to pay my rent and expenses. I learned that working almost 2 full time jobs in order to progress quickly, without eating or sleeping properly, is not sustainable.

Lettings Negotiator

London Based Estate Agents

[Duration 4 months]

Failure 5:

My naive honesty about who I was related to within the same industry caused friction between myself and the owner of the franchise. I lost my drive to perform for that company and took another job.

What I learned from my failure:

If being honest about who you are and where you come from creates friction, it may be worth considering whether they are the right people to associate yourself with. The next company looked after me much better.

Lettings Negotiator

London Based Estate Agents

[Duration 2 years]

Failure 6:

I regularly missed my target, despite having some great months.

What I learned from my failure:

I was unwilling to compromise on my morals in order to make money where others might. I only did well when I was completely passionate about how I was helping people, and if I was having to sell something I didn’t believe in, I couldn’t fake the passion.

Failure 7:

I completely lost sight of who I was, what I liked, what was important to me and allowed social pressures of living in London to dictate how I lived.

What I learned from my failure:

Living a life which looks good on paper, or social media or to your family and peers is not living a life. Living a life which lights you up and allows you to make the most of your body and mind, whilst taking care of them, regardless of what others think, is living a life.

Failure 8:

I lost my mental and physical health as I knew it.

What I learned from my failure:

I learned to start to create boundaries for myself.

Trainer, Waiting Staff & First Aider

Italian Restaurant Chain

[Duration 6 months before & 6 months after travelling]

Failure 9:

I worked hard, rarely socialised and lacked connection with my family or community. I was still lost and failed to ask for help. I was only working to gain money to travel.

What I learned from my failure:

Although the travel was worthwhile and had a lot of valuable lessons of its own, I needn’t have gone through those 6 months alone without the support that I needed. If I had asked for help, I would have received some.

Failure 10:

I was turned down to become a trainer because I had warned them I was leaving to go travelling in 4 months time. A month before I left, they begged me to train the staff because the current trainers had lost enthusiasm.

What I learned from my failure:

I didn’t regret being honest about leaving because I felt it helped the business to plan around that, although I realise that without confidence to push why I should be considered for the trainer position it held me back in progressing. When I was finally asked to become a trainer I created such a helpful training manual to leave behind that they gave me a voucher gift as a thank you upon leaving. I believe they used the manual for many years afterwards. I learned to have the confidence to sell myself better and push for progression if I felt I could benefit the company, regardless of length of service.

Bookings Manager (Branch Manager)

Event Staffing Company

[Duration 10 weeks]:

Failure 11:

I was let go from this job 10 weeks after starting. They said I’d be grateful one day.

What I learned from my failure:

I am grateful that they ended that role for me. Due to a restructure in the business which couldn’t be helped, I was left with literally no support. I ended up being the only one in the satellite office and I couldn’t access management by phone most days. They brought in temporary staff who had worked there before (therefore not needing support) until they could get a plan together. I learned that ending a work situation as quickly as possible if it is detrimental for your mental and physical health is a good idea, even if it is done for you. You can also quickly get over the shock, disappointment and anger - if you allow yourself.

Head of Sales & Customer Service

Medical Supplies Company

[Duration 3.5 years]:

Failure 12:

I felt like I failed to protect my team.

What I learned from my failure:

I adored my team who I hired, trained and managed myself. I negotiated pay rises on their behalf and ensured they were looked after by the company. One day, the company was sold and I was told 5 minutes before they were made redundant. I was already contracted to the next company I worked for and working across both companies without any knowledge it was to be sold. I was grateful I hadn’t known about the sale because I couldn’t have lied to my team or maintained my enthusiasm for the company in the same way. It was like my baby! My team were given a fair package and found other work easily. I learned that I had done everything I could for them and I couldn’t ask more of myself than that. I also learned that my Directors were protecting me by not telling me.

Failure 13:

I was so invested in the success of this company, that I struggled with anxiety. I was so anxious that I developed daily physical pain and an anxiety tick.

What I learned from my failure:

Although I can thrive professionally in sporadically high stress situations, it is not possible for my body and mind to sustain their performance without looking after myself. The pain lasted more than 2 years until I learned to overcome it and the tick withdrew as soon as I took some time out for myself. I occasionally get both physical symptoms when I feel under pressure. It is a welcome reminder to balance myself.

Clinical Engagement Manager

Medical Software Company

[Duration 1 year]:

Failure 14:

I was working for Directors who I knew valued me, for more money than before and for a company I believed would benefit a lot of people, but I still wasn’t fulfilled.

What I learned from my failure:

I had moved into a non-management role, where I no longer felt I was progressing in the way I enjoyed. I had lost the work culture I had worked so hard to create in my previous role and I felt too detached from the people benefiting from the work I was doing. I wouldn’t be able to give that company my best work and we both deserved a better match. I left on great terms and I still value their friendship, input and opinions to this day.

Failure 15:

I went back to work too quickly after a head trauma which delayed my recovery. I felt loyalty to my company and didn’t want to let them down, and therefore prioritised them over my health. It resulted in me feeling inadequate, frustrated, exhausted and delayed my recovery.

What I learned from my failure:

It isn’t possible to see cognitive health externally. I should have been more honest with my employer and prioritised my health. It would have been better for both of us in the long run.

How do I feel having written this Failure CV?

Actually writing these failures down has really helped me to let go of any societal hangups such as: if you change jobs, you are seen as ‘flighty’, or one should aspire to ‘work hard, play hard’.

Quite frankly, I value my health so much more now than I even realised was possible when I first started my career. Without positive mental and physical health, I cannot provide value to my company, family, friends or community, let alone to myself. For the record, I include mindset and confidence as part of positive mental health.

P.S. I hope you have taken something positive from reading My Failure CV. Please feel free to share it if you think it could help someone you know.

In June 2020, I launched a podcast called LIVING MORE OF A LIFE, aims to increase awareness on a number of issues which stop us living more of a life. Many of these topics are not commonly talked about.

It will challenge what we learn from a very young age, how society dictates so much of our lives and what we can actually do to take more control.

It will provide inspiration and knowledge as well as the opportunity to hear other people’s stories about what they have experienced, often silently.